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Every once in a while, you see someone sharing a picture of a can of “Bernard Dehydrated Water.” There seem to be many of these old cans around and some have been sold on eBay. The vintage cans read “EMPTY CONTENTS OF CAN INTO ONE GALLON OF WATER. STIR UNTIL DISSOLVED. CHILL AND SERVE.” The small print reads “Manufacturers and distributors to the Nation’s fine eating establishments, General Offices, Bernard Food Industries, Inc.” Some people wonder why in the world anyone would try to perpetrate such a hoax. Dehydrated water? Add it TO water?
What is Dehydrated Water?
Well, dehydrated water is not a hoax, but simply a gag gift. Regardless, the website Museum of Hoaxes has an article about them (which acknowledges the joke). These cans of dehydrated water are actually empty tin cans made by a real food company, Bernard Food Industries, which began making the cans in 1964. Of course, there is no such thing as dehydrated water, in reality.
The cans were never meant to fool anyone. Bernard made them as a novelty or gag item, something to be displayed at stores to make people laugh, get them talking, etc. According to the Flickr user from whom I borrowed the image used on this page (see image credit below picture), they even trademarked the cans.
The comedian Stephen Wright may or may not have been familiar with these cans when he joked “I bought some dehydrated water, but I didn’t know what to mix it with.” If he had read the label, he would have known, of course, to add water…duh.
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Bernard Food Industries
From 1947, Bernard sold many dehydrated foods, canned foods, dietetic products, and other products meant for institutional or restaurant food use. They were also one of the first, if not the first company to use an artificial non-nutritive sweetener in a baking mix, which the company still offers today in its line of Sweet’N Low Bakery Mixes.
Bernard’s dehydrated water in a can is not the only reference to dehydrated water. It’s an old joke. There is even a website called “buydehydratedwater” that is well-crafted enough to fool some people into thinking its ridiculous pseudoscience ramblings about how the dehydrated water capsules are made are something more than a joke. It is, of course, meant to be humorous.
Even now, on Amazon, you can buy a can of Witty Yetis Dehydrated Water. One 16oz can make up to infinite gallons. The perfect gift for someone who has it all, the product is, of course, gluten free, MSG free, and 100% free of all chemicals except the chemicals in the air inside the can.
Another dehydrated water novelty is ‘Dr. Health’s Dehydrated Water,’ an attractive blue can with the slogan Spring Water Without All the Wetness. No calories, fat, cholesterol, and of course, no artificial ingredients. How’s that for healthy? These cans may be available from sellers on eBay or other websites where collectibles are sold.
Uses for Dehydrated Water
Benard Food Industries, on their webpage about dehydrated water, suggests several humorous ‘uses’ for their dehydrated water:
- Dry Martinis-Manhattans
- Watering Cactus
- VW Bug Anti-Freeze
- Dry Cleaning
- Humidifying Saunas
- Filling Dry Docks
- Dry Mopping Floors
- In Dry Sinks
- Dry Shampoos
- In Dry-Cell Batteries
- Dampening Dry Humor
- Making Dry Ice
- JUST ADD WATER TO THIS HILARIOUS PRODUCT. Make thirst disappear with our new formula that when diluted, can make up to infinite gallons of water. So practical - we couldnt believe it wasnt available sooner!
Prices pulled from the Amazon Product Advertising API on:
Product prices and availability are accurate as of the date/time indicated and are subject to change. Any price and availability information displayed on [relevant Amazon Site(s), as applicable] at the time of purchase will apply to the purchase of this product.
Is Bernard Dehydrated Water for Sale?
Yes! I contacted Bernard Foods, and they told me that you can buy cans of Bernard Dehydrated water through eDiet.com. They sell for $5 a can, and $60 for a case, plus shipping. Free shipping is offered for orders of $75 or more. Use the code “75ship.” (Update: Now Available on Amazon – at least for now.)
You can still find vintage cans for sale. They sell quickly! Check sites like Etsy, eBay, antiquesnavigator.com, etc. as some cans pop up from different sellers once in a while. Expect to pay somewhere between 5 to 10 dollars.
If you are not a collector and you want to give someone a can of dehydrated water as a gag gift, you may be better off with one of the new cans.
How Do You Dehydrate Water?
There is actually an article on Instructables.com about ‘how to dehydrate water.’ The article is a joke, just as the cans of dehydrated water are jokes. It pains me to have to inform anyone that it is not possible to ‘dehydrate’ water as water itself is the means by which things become ‘hydrated.’
When something is hydrated it means that its molecules have been chemically combined with water. We often talk about the human body being dehydrated. This simply means that we need to drink water or take in enough water for our body to function.
If you evaporate water in a pan on a hot stove, you are not dehydrating the water but only changing its form from a liquid to a vapor, which we call steam.
